What on earth? It’s been a crazy time and here we are in the midst / tail end of the holiday season. All I can think about is if I made a mistake at the office. I loathe to make mistakes, own them immediately and rectify, if possible, just as fast. I’ve been awake since 2 a.m. with the nagging thought that I may not have done something correctly late in the day at work while suffering from holidaze. Now paying a hefty price for the end of the day laughter and camaraderie – maybe why I made the error, if I did make the error and oh dear I do think I did!

Worse, I don’t think I can do anything to make myself feel better and so I feel powerless, inept and twisted up in my stomach. I know I talk a lot about staying positive and mindful and I obviously didn’t practice my mindfulness or else I would not be thinking that I made a mistake. MINDFULNESS!!! Gotta get that mantra back into play – things get all twisted when I don’t!

Ever notice that sometimes the simpler the task the more likely an error can be made? That’s just a nasty feeling because you know it was so easy to fix and ugh – Dear God – I am not going to have an easy time letting this go…

So much for a nice long weekend relaxing – I’m in knots!

I’ve had a heck of a week with ants invading daily in my kitchen and unable to reach my exterminator. I’ve been spraying all sorts of nasty stuff on them as they don’t seem interested in all the traps I’ve laid out. I had to take my eldest cat, Rembrandt, to the emergency vet at 2 a.m Tuesday morning and stressed about him and his health because my other cat decided to beat him up 🙁 Yesterday morning the power went out, I burned my hands on bleach and was late to work with all the mess on the roads from downed trees and wires, police and firetrucks fleeing here and there. Then this… this is not the worst but it’s bad and I’m afraid I’m stuck with it and that makes me so mad at myself… Gotta break this cycle!

I know I am not suppose to write about being flawed right? I keep telling myself if I made a mistake it’s okay – we all make mistakes.. but again, this isn’t helping. I wish today was another workday (eeek!) but I would feel better in 2 hours if that was possible because for better or for worse I would have closure. But… today is Saturday (yay?) so I get to dwell in this madness until Wednesday – slow torture.

Not sure about Rembrandt…. I just picked him up and felt a lump which could be an abscess – think I need to take him to the vet today… Please send positive healing his way. I thought he was okay until just now 🙁

My stress levels are through the roof!

For you, beautiful souls, I wish better. I wish for you to be healthy, happy and at peace with your life. I think we all get caught up in the mad dashes and maybe lose sight of what is important! Consider this a friendly reminder to stay present and take heed from my work example.

By remaining mindful and staying present we maintain a greater sense of peace and joy. We are less likely to miss important details in life and more inclined to capture what is a wonderful life!

Stay safe, be happy, remain peaceful and tend to your mental and physical health. I’m going to try to do the same even with these nasty hurdles in my brain.

Persevere and Purr Out!